Just do the dishes

First off. What was the thing I was most worried about with returning home? Fitting back in. Returning back to my old life, meshing my new self with my old surroundings. How would people treat me. Would I get along with my family? Would I drive my parents crazy? Would they drive me crazy? Looking back, I realize how foolish all that worry was.
I should have known.
I should have realized that my family is my family, no matter what. Home will always be home. No matter where I go. My parents are my wonderful, loving, faithful parents and boy are they ever amazing! Long story short. Coming back home is like putting back on your old favorite shoes. They fit just like you remember them. They are so comfortable and natural that pretty quickly you forget completely about them. A friend summed it up nicely when he said, "It's weird how normal this is." For a couple weeks before and the whole plane ride over I was bracing myself for my return. I was expecting it to be challenging, in the least. Possibly even awkward after being away for so long. But was the complete opposite. It was easy! In fact, too easy. And that is where my challenge came.
While I was away, I was alone. I may have been surrounded by people but when it really came down to it, all I had was myself and of course, the Lord. And it was during those months alone that I grew the strongest. When I came home, I was all of a sudden back in the setting where I could rely on people again. My parents, grandparents, friends, I was surrounded by people who loved me, cared for me and were willing to do anything for me. As wonderful as this was, I could feel myself slipping. Within the first few weeks I was beginning to rely on these people more and on myself and the Lord less. Scripture study and prayer which had become automatic, my life line, my strength were already beginning to loose importance to me. I was becoming complacent, lazy. Really, it was all too easy. Where were my challenges? The trials I had been expecting? Everything I had learned while I was away I was slowly forgetting. It's funny how much you can change, and it's funnier how in such a short time you can go right back to where you started from.
It only took a week or so till the novelty of being back wore off. Then the misery set in. Outside, I smiled. To the strangers and golfers and acquaintances I smiled and nodded and told them how wonderful NZ was and yes, how I was enjoying being home. I told them all what they were expecting to hear, but if anyone looked any deeper they would see how close I was to breaking down. I was miserable, I didn't want to be there. I missed NZ, and it killed me to think of everyone and everything I had left behind there. And even worse, knowing how unlikely it was that I would be going back.
All the assurances I had received, how Canada was really the right place for me, this was where I belonged, where my future was. I forgot about that. I completely forgot and was beginning to doubt everything that I once accepted as fact. Regret. That ugly word that I try so hard to avoid. Could it be possible it was creeping into my life?
I was loosing it, and I couldn't see anyway out.

But if you noticed, that was all written in past tense. I have been home for almost a month now. And while I am still struggling I have recently remembered something that changes everything. You might remember this post. Actually, you probably won't, that was ages ago. Infact it took me a couple minutes of digging before I could find it. There was one point on there that I have always remembered and tried to live by. If you don't feel like following the link, here's the important part...

If you ever find yourself staying at someone else's house and you don't feel completely comfortable just cause you feel awkward and are not sure what's going on- do the dishes. Seriously. Or help make dinner, or just clean something. Soon you will know how the house runs, where all the dishes go and will feel much more comfortable. And they will love you cause you are cleaning up.

While in NZ I lived by this philosophy. I especially tried to do everthing I could for those wonderful people who opened up their homes, hearts, and lives to me. But I have found that it translates into just about everything in life. Service. It is the key to it all! When life is getting tough, I guarentee someone else is having a tougher time. When you are bieng weighed down by your own problems and troubles, try helping someone else out. Instead of focusing on me, me, me look around! In your prayers remember those who need help. Pretty quick your problems will seem so much smaller, so much more managable. JUST DO THE DISHES!

I love it here, I really do. I am learning to see the beauty in this dry, flat country. I am learning to accept everyone here for who they are and love them for it. I am learning that, like many other things in this town, the challenges don't always hit you right away. It's sneakier than that. Satan comes up behind you and slowly grabs you, rather than slapping you in your face. My time in Cardston will be challenging in ways I can't predict. But in the end, I will gain so much from it. The problems are unique, but the solution is always the same. Scriptures and prayers. Hold onto that rod like your life depends on it, cause it does. Remember who you are, where you came from, and where you've been. Don't slip backwards, keep moving forward, cause there's something even greater coming up.

Days 5-11 of boring travel log. Enjoy!

Feel free to skip this post if you want. I just feel obligated to put it in here cause... it's a good idea to finish what you start right? Also, this blog is about my journey and this was definitely part of that journeying. Okay, where did we leave off... right day 5. We have a lot of catching up to do, I will try to make this as painless as possible.

Day 5 
Start off Inca trail.
Okay so a little bit of background here. I was supposed to do the inca trail with everyone but because I joined the group a little later there was some problems with paperwork and other really annoying things. Apparently it's really hard to get in to hike the inca trail. Bottom line, I wasn't able to do it. At first I was upset at this, but Daniel assured me he would take me on some awesome hikes while the group was gone. So tuesday morning the group set off for the inca trail.  And what would you know? Brad was really sick, too sick to go. So him and his Dad decided to stay. That meant more hiking buddies! The first one was one of the mountains in Ollantaytambo. The biggest one, of course. The altitude made it quite difficult, but I pushed myself to keep up. Lots of ruins to see on the way up and an awesome view from the top.
Later that day, we drove back to Cusco. I was grateful for this because there is so much to see and do in Cusco and we didn't really have enough time. So now we had another day to visit all the sites.
Day 6
Tour around Cusco. Moray, Saskawama, Urubamba Valley. Lots of cool places.
Side note* could it be that my sense of direction is finally developed? I didn't get lost once in Peru, and most of the time I was one of the only people who knew where we were or how to get back. I was quite proud of myself for that.
Day 7
Bus back to Ollantaytambo and then train on to Aguas Callientas.
I was excited for my first real train ride. For the first couple minutes at least, turns out the novelty wears off pretty quick.
Aguas Callientas (translates into Hot Water- due to the natural hot springs nearby) is a small, ugly little town squished in between some beautiful mountains. It could be a lot more beautiful than it is, especially with all the people that pour into there (it being the closest town to Macchupicchu)
Daniel, Brad, Clay and I hiked up a mountain called Putacusi. It is the neighboring mountain to macchupicchu so we had an incredible view from the top. It was also cool seeing all the foliage and jungle like growth on this mountain. Especially when contrasted to the almost desert climate at Ollantaytambo.  The coolest part though was the beginning when we had to climb up some almost sheer cliffs with nothing but a metal cable to hold onto. Basically rock climbing without any of the rock climbing equipment. Dan was worried that I would get scared and freeze up. Something to do with the 50 meter drop straight down? But I was fine. I almost think there might me something wrong with me, how is it that I was not scared at all? I guess heights is just not one of those things that do it for me.
Day 8 
Day 8 began at 2:30 am. We woke up and got inline for the busses up the mounain to Maucchupicchu. Why so early? Well besides the fact that we are all a little nuts, we wanted to climb Waynapicchu, the mountain behind Macchupicchu, and they only let 400 people/day go up there. And we wanted to be one of those first 400. It was worth it though, the view was fantastic, of course there were more ruins on the top, and the hike was definitely challenging. Especially the back half around to the place called Grand Caverna, this was optional, but of course we did it. Turned out it was an extra 2 hours of strait stairs. Stairs going down, stairs going up. Not one bit of it was flat. We were beginning to hate the Incas and their stupid little stairs.
Met up with the rest of the group on Macchupicchu. By this time we were all so tired we couldn't really appreciate it as much as it deserved.  But it was magnificent to wander around those incredible ruins for a while. We oogled at the appropriate places, took the required pictures and then headed back for some well deserved R&R.
Day 9 
Flew from Cusco to Puerto Maldonado, deep in the Amazon jungle. The weather was beautifully hot and sticky. Although I think Daniel and I were the only ones who appreciated the humidity. Once we arrived at Puerto Maldonado we bussed for about 45 minutes and then another 45 minute boat ride to the lodge. The lodge was incredible, I think this was the favorite part of my journey. No power, no water. Just generators and wells. It was sort of like 5 star camping. The rooms were just bamboo walls with a thatched roof and one side of the room was just a railing that opened directly out onto the jungle. The food, so good. A hike through the jungle (no stupid incan steps here, thank goodness) and a climb up a 127 foot tower to see out above the tree canopy. Later that night, a dance featuring kids from the nearest local village.
Day 10
Due to a welcome cold front, the weather was a manageable temperature, although all the guides were freezing. Went boating around the lake, wildlife spotting, treks through the jungle, a visit to the local medicine man. I could have spent a couple more days here. But, alas, the next day was time to leave.
Day 11
Now we did the whole trip in reverse. 45 minute boat ride, 45 minute bus ride, short stop to Puerto Maldonado to get the rest of our gear. And then on to the airport. (this airport, by the way, was incredibly dodgy. 2 Gates, 3 check in counters. Security was a joke. There weren't even any proper walls on the building! Although I'm beginning to think that none of the buildings there have proper walls. Makes sense.) 1 hour flight to Cusco, and then 1 1/2 hour to Lima. We had 4 hours of free time in Lima, we had to be at the airport by 10pm. Plane left at 1am. Fly 8 hours to Toronto, clear security, then 5 hours to Calgary, where we arrived at 3:10. Some strange kids ran up to meet me at the airport, they looked vaguely familiar but were way too old to be related to me! Oh wait, no those are my little sisters and brother each about 6 inches taller. Was so good to see them all again. But you get to hear all about that in another post. And now, boring travel journal = check!

PS please excuse any spelling mistakes. I am way to lazy to go back and edit that!!